You Are Not Alone

"Trauma victims can heal more completely if their need for stable connection is met
by family, friends,  or other social outlets." 
- everyone.


"... But they ain't stable, and I'm tired of trying to explain my own baffling brain."
- enough of us.




Welcome to the  TMFR Blanket Fort.
A home for recovery-minded Fuckers...
To talk about things they've never voiced
Using words they've never had
With the information our early lives never provided


Join your new, sortof Fucked Up Family.

(healthily-bounded and aimed at autonomy)
at  Patreon.com/traumatizedmotherfuckers
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TMFR
Blanket Fort

Private community and full Podcast episode stream

The Traumatized Motherfuckers' Blanket Fort at Patreon - It's TMFR HQ. 

 

Why is this a closed community? Answer: "Trauma Responsibility." Scroll down to the bottom for the full answer!

For $3, get a trial taste of the show with a limited set of episodes to sample. Go ahead, decide if you like my approach before you commit. To make it even simpler, subscribe to your trial through Spotify! 

 

For $5, jump into the FULL backlog of shows! Git your private RSS code for streaming the locked catalogue of 200ish shows so far... and autopopulate your phone as they come out, released most weeks. Everything from personal experience to increasingly-educated reflection to deep-diving academic research... then applied to real life trauma troubles. AND talk via "forum" community format via Patreon to EVERYONE in the group. Answer polls and merch callouts, discuss the private episode posts, and share insight with fellow MFs.

 

For $10, if you're into the "chat community" format, there's a private group for that! Getcher episodes AND jump into the CLOSED DOOR, Niched-down Discord server 2.0, and chat in real time with Fuckers from around the world. Find answers with folks who are also working on moving past their trauma, right from your phone or PC. 

For $20, get all of the above... and I'll give you whatever extras I can offer to help put the education in ACTION. More visual resources, bonus episodes, and quarterly Ask Me Anythings. Plus, merch loyalty program with new designs each year, for proud MFs. Honestly, though, you're helping to support the show/my ability to keep making it. Consider these the "pay it forward" tiers. 

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TMFR
Beta Discord

The Free Community Attempt

The first attempt at a Discord Chat community, created early on, June 2020. Expanded December 2020. Abandoned 2021.

 

You know... turns out being all-inclusive and all-free for all-sufferers sounds like the right thing to do... but it doesn't always work out. Lots of trauma perspectives, differing commitment levels, and no promise that anyone is going to answer you (because they joined the "why not, it's free" club). And LOTS of reactivity among survivally-activated trauma-selves, to boot.

 

SO.  This community has been "in between" death and hibernation for a while.

 

Consider this "hoping everyone will prove me wrong in 2022 after the trigger-fests that happened prior to shutting this bitch down in 2021." I'll give it another try if you will - I want everyone to have the option for community, despite any trauma-typical financial limitations.

 

THINGS TO KNOW:

Enter this freebie at your own risk. NO ONE IS MONITORING THIS GROUP,  IT COULD BE TRIGGERING, AND NO ONE HERE IS LIABLE FOR YOUR POTENTIAL MENTAL HEALTH BACKSLIDES. Scroll down further for information on the inherent challenges of community healing for relational trauma. 

 

Applications are approved in batches every month or so, to "kickstart" connection opportunities and revamp the community with each new entry of a similarly-unfamiliar herd - please don't nag at me in between enrollments.

 

Remember: It's nice to observe... but git talkin' or there's no communing to be had. 

An ethical trauma-note on the TMFR Community. 

Why is this a "closed door" community and series of shows? 

PTSD creates a few personality templates during recovery, if you trust my experiences so far.

During some stages, folks can be reactive, rather defensive, and ready to stir any pot they encounter.

 

You know, been there. But it's not great.

Unfortunately, while these TMFRs are just as deserving of education, help, and support... not everyone is able to self-reflect without exploding. Then they undermine the system by destabilizing the "safe, secure, boundary-respecting" community vibe / trigger intended-friends to oblivion. 

As CPTSD is just as likely to produce abusers as abusees, in May 2020 it became "wise" to create a boundary between brain-manipulating information, newbie trauma recoverers.... and people who might not have the best Self-regulation at this point. 

{Plus... plenty of people I don't need crossing MY boundaries; snooping through the show after losing personal contact. Dickheads.}

So the Blanket Fort was born - A safe place where membership is trackable and redactable through Patreon. And it continues to be our best way to stay emotional abuse -distanced, so we can do our trauma recovery damndest.

Join the Blanket Fort when you're ready to really do the work.

But Be Kind, or your ass will get removed from the club.

We're all in this together.

Cheers.

 

REMINDER:

There are inherent risks and rewards with any of our relationships; it’s the nature of CPTSD, ya heard? 

 

Please know that this private group exists because:

  1. You’ll learn immediately that you aren’t alone in this. The shit in your head and subsequent life outcomes are shockingly unoriginal, despite your best efforts to convince yourself you’re uniquely screwed. 

  2. You can learn from each other. People have already waded through the sewage you haven’t tackled yet, and vice-versa. Take real life tips and skip the hard-earned lessons; help others do the same.

  3. You can practice safe, healthy relationships with appropriate boundaries and realistic personal expectations (for both self and other, fucking Fawners). 

 

 

 

All of this being said.

 

There are dangers in “trauma connecting.” There are dangers in spending TOO much time talking-trauma (can attest). There are dangers in exposing yourself to others' trauma. And there are dangers in starting to rely on others before relying on yerdamnself. 

The point being…

 

Disclaimer:

 

Enter the community knowing what it does provide - comradery with strangers like you’ve never seen. Self-acceptance. Other-acceptance. Unfiltered conversations about your dark bits. Celebrations of the good days, unravelment of the shit ones. 

 

But also what it doesn’t provide.... This isn’t a crisis resource. This isn’t a professionally moderated discussion board. This isn’t a board to recklessly trauma-vomit before taking time for yourself, ideally with your therapist. 

 

This is a community for people like you, with real lives, real strengths, AND real shortcomings… who are trying to relearn how to live a life they didn't get a chance at, using information they never got the first go-around. 

 

Same goes for the podcast. 

Let's be responsible and respectful, with our self recovery always first in mind and others' opinions last. 

 

Love you Fuckers. Get safe-connection building. 

 

Jess