


Full Episode Guide
Not doomed. Not damaged. Not dead yet.
A lot gets done in 2.5 years, and this has been an evolving project (AKA - an unexpected podcast)
The 9 seasons have their own trends. The 2-300 episode array can be dizzying. The topics are vast.
So here's your guide to better navigate the journey, Motherfucker.
And here's the quick rundown on each season, May 2020 - present.
In general, they start "easy listening" before growing more densely research focused...
and then turn towards a lighter "how-to change a life" vibe in season 8-9.
For the full cognitive effect? Walk with me and reflect thoroughly.
Season One: 22 Eps
Episode tone: More personal and emotional. Light listening. Early in trauma education, starting to look back on life to see deeper pattern replications running through relationships. Personal introductions and trends.
Trends: Reflecting on life with CPTSD, highlights of recovery perspectives, early measures to reduce trauma symptoms and counteract usual narratives, recovery motivation, initial realizations of trauma, aiming for family relationship healing.
Season Two: 17 Eps
Episode tone: Experiential and emotional reflection on life with complex trauma. Easy listening. Early days in podcasting and understanding trauma trends. Personal introduction, recovery pointers, perspective shifts.
Episode trends: Reflecting on a life lived with CPTSD, early recovery pointers & perspective reframes, recognition of trauma, understanding emotions, masking mental illness, overcompensation and escapism, intro to financial trauma, health trauma.
Season Three: 38 Eps
Episode tone: Entering research mode, as avoided family trauma wounds rise and mental health becomes harder to support through grief. Biology takes a forefront in the discussion, as we start talking on research topics.
Episode trends: Research heavier, emotional examination, evolutionary biology emphasis, disassociation, survival responses, distress, chaos, depression, sensitivity, stimulation, hypervigilance, grandiose narcissism, abuse patterns, relationships, memory, intro to neurobiology, rumination, anxiety, loss, estrangement, family re-immersion, holiday specials.
Season Four: 28 Eps
Episode tone: Heavy research masking heavy emotions. Narrowing discussions on specific aspects of real-life with trauma backed up by outside sources. Abuse is in the cards.
Episode trends: Relationship patterns, recovering with body awareness and behavioral science, fucked up core beliefs, neuroplasticity introductions, disassociative identities, parental realizations, narcissism, vulnerable narcissism, victimhood, emotional manipulation, self-harm, black sheeping, family hierarchies, family obligation, trauma patterns, generational trauma, societal examination, mental heuristics, sexual abuse, gender, sexuality, and covert abuse.
Season Five: 40 Eps
Episode tone: Research integration and application in real life. Dark and serious. Look, when circumstances are “uncontrollable chaos and historical abuse reborn” ya fragment, and the protective parts come out. Big change is underway, including tent-living in my favorite woods. Maybe the best season.
Episode trends: Post-pandemic, human performance, tapdancing for others, boundaries, fragmented personalities (DID, disassociative identities, fractionalized memories, internal family systems, schema theory), neural networks, brain development, science of connection, social animal programming, social learning, syncing, enmeshment, dysregulated parents, parenting styles, fawning, trauma-self, taking back control, animal friends, Archiewheeliepup, tour de life.
Season Six: 30 Eps
Episode tone: Focused on refinding your Self and redirecting life course to embody that human… transitions into understanding trauma neurobiology and working with your brain functions. Personally, grieving. Some emotional episodes come out alongside the research.
Episode trends: Self, empowerment, life change, values, self-concept, neurobiology, brain functions, biological resource limitations, rapid change, lone wolfing it, going no contact, family of origin, depersonalization, derealization, relationships, environmental triggers, emotional protection, attachment, brain management, rewiring.
Season Seven: 23 Eps
Episode tone: It’s an internal battle, recovery brain vs. re-emerging trauma brain. Attempts to make sense of the cognitive events taking place through intensive research. Personal details fade, as the family system stalks the project and volleys back punishment. Research becomes the medium for conversation. Sense of shame, childhood parts activation, and fear of disclosure grow.
Episode trends: Time distortions, cognitive distortions, examining “perspective” in all its gaslighting glory, perspective as basis for PTSD, “the danger of the aftermath,” trauma transmission, resistance vs. resilience, societal commentary, social stress, generational societal trauma, resources required for recovery.
Season Eight: 35 Eps
Episode tone: “Here we go! Time to get back on track!” after leaving filial obligation trap. (Unfair self-expectations for immediate recovery create inner turmoil). A renewed focus on the basics of recovery and needed resources. Societal commentary on the situation we’re all trapped within.
Episode trends: Obligation, filial obligation, recovery, society, social trauma, Self, fragmentation, recovery, obligatory relationships, guilt, the aftermath, inner work, self-empowerment.
Season Nine: 23 Eps (more in progress)
Episode tone: Applying the research so far and doing the work. Inner work, outer work, and reintegration. Step-by-step how-to and lighter tone.
Episode trends: Inner work, outer work, reintegration, stabilization, processing, self-limitation, Self, parts, conscious and subconscious, making changes, leaving trauma patterns, creating new lives.
